Is sex getting boring or monotonous? Are you and your partner feeling the need to spice up your sex life? Then how about introducing a little bit of BDSM play into the bedroom? Discover 7 things to try if you are new to BDSM.
First and foremost, let’s define BDSM.
What does BDSM stand for?
B = Bondage. Tying up or being tied up.
D = Domination. Someone (a dominant) completely controlling and the other (a submissive) completely (or partially) submitting.
S & M = Sadism and Masochism. Giving/receiving pleasure from pain.
Getting Things Started…
When getting started with any BDSM activity, talk to your significant other FIRST. Discuss what it is exactly that you’d like to try and experiment. Next, set up boundaries. Why? It’s because many BDSM activities (for example, domination) require a high level of trust between partners.
Then, decide on a safe word to use with your partner when you want things to stop. (Remember, you should NEVER feel like you can’t trust your partner!).
Now, you are ready to step into the world of BDSM. Enjoy!
7 Things To Try If You Are New To BDSM
1. Playful Spanking
Go ahead! Smack that bum! According to a recent research study, light spanking increases blood flow to the genital area (and buttocks!) which increases the overall sensation and pleasure of the sex act.
Spanking can be done with your hand or anything you can get your hands on. Also, don’t forget to warm up that sexy bottom before going full force on it.
2. Hair Pulling
Hair pulling is extremely easy, doesn’t require any fancy (and, usually expensive) toys, and can be as gentle (or as rough!) as you want it to be. Overall, it’s perfect for those who are just starting in the world of kinky play.
3. Aggressive/Dirty Language
Incorporating dirty words like slut, whore, bitch, and fuck into your play can be extremely sexy. Here are a few dirty talk phrases you can use in order to build sexual tension:
- I need to feel you inside me.
- If these people weren’t here, I would be on my knees with your big cock in my mouth.
- Guess what colour my panties are?
- I just want to be your little fuck doll.
- I’ve been really bad and need to be punished.
4. Biting
Biting can be extremely pleasurable when done correctly. Just take a look at this short video made by AskMen’s Wing Girl Marni where she shares her top tips for introducing biting into your bedroom repertoire:
5. Incorporating “Sir” Or “Madam”
In addition to aggressive/dirty language, you can also try to incorporate words such as Sir or Madam into your BDSM play.
After all, it’s a simple way to establish roles in a dominant/submissive relationship and keep you both involved in the kinky fantasy.
6. Temperature Play
Warm candle wax, ice cubes, hot water; sensually caressing one another’s body with anything that can change the skin temperature can surely heat things up. Here’s a quick temperature play idea:
Run an ice cube over your blindfolded partner’s spanked bottom for an astonishing yet soothing temperature change… Or, slide the ice cube over her hard nipples and wet genitals and then follow the icy trail with a warm lick of your tongue. Hot!
7. Worship
Admire a specific area of your partner’s body? Then spend some extra time lavishing attention on it. Don’t hurry to get to the end result of sex.
Explore and worship your partner’s erogenous zones. For example, if you love breasts, spend a few minutes massaging them with a warm body oil. Love feet? Massage, kiss and suck those toes! Whatever area turns you on, take the extra time to play with it. Your partner will love it too!
What are your top things to try if you are new to BDSM?
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